I was a little stunned to hear the news.

It turns out Facebook thinks I’m dead. See the image above.

I opened my Facebook page and was going to change my Facebook profile picture. At the top, there’s a rather morbid notice. It says: “We hope people who love John will find comfort in the things others share to remember and celebrate his life.”

Hold on there, for a second. Something is not quite right.

For starters, who writes these memorials? There are a few issues, other than the obvious one that I’m still alive and well. So, the people who love me are going to go on Facebook and find out I’m deceased, apparently, and take comfort in a bunch of random thoughts and photos from people who don’t love me. I guess when I finally do kick the bucket, it won’t bother me that someone dug up an old photo of me finishing a bike race or hugging one of my kids, but could they have worded it a little better? It seems like a bad newspaper memorial from the 70s, written by an intern.

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